The WarBug JitterBug

"Soon it will come to the folk-attention how close Wernher von Braun's birthday is to the Spring Equinox..."

- Pynchon, 'Gravity's Rainbow'

Arduenn Schwartzman is the creator of the marvellous 'Warbug' range of SL aircraft, as well as many other gadgets, gizmos and widgets - not to mention the BratWurst Oral Valentines Day Gift, the Potato Chip Cruncher, the Terror Bunny shoulder-pet and the adorable Wearable Dogfight Planes.

Tutsy, the Puddlegums and I are big fans of Arduenn's work. His sense of humour, sense of fun and creativity scream out at you in most everything he makes.

Arduenn is currently working on a rather hush-hush project with the much respected MadPea Productions. We look forward to seeing the outcome of that collaboration in a few months or so.

Tutsy and I discovered Arduenn's SL region, Black Forest , by accident when we were looking for a specific scene for my MachinimUWA V entry, "Fwd: Evolution". As it happens, we did find what we went looking for but on another region entirely! And then, the scene in question didn't actually make it into the final cut of the film anyway!

And thus was the circuitous route that the Mistress of Serendipity introduced us to Arduenn's creations! Since then, between the lot of us, I reckon we must have purchased at least one of everything in his stores!

Of special interest to us in this particular blog-post is Ardueen's fabulous 'WarBug' aircraft and the dogfights which occur in them at Black Forest.

The cumulative Combat Score for successfully shooting down an opponent is displayed on this website. I am currently ranked #67.

Rocky Vansant - a charismatic and fun guy that I have met before - is ranked #1. However, he somehow neglected to mention this fact while we were dogfighting...

Last week, I was dancing at Old Lar's House when I received an IM from Arduenn. In amongst our much longer chat was buried this gem in reference to the v2 iteration of the LLab viewer:

Arduenn Schwartzman: I blame V2

Pixie Rain: the WW2 German rocket?

Arduenn Schwartzman: lol

Arduenn Schwartzman: I should make a V2 Warbug!

Arduenn Schwartzman: and I should write 'Wernher von Braun' on them

Pixie Rain: YES!

And so was born Arduenn's latest creation - the V-2 Warbug Rocket - which I am grateful to be recognised as the Muse for and to have received a free copy of.

Saturday morning Tutsy and I piled over to Black Forest itching to dogfight against all comers in our Red Barron and V-2 Rocket Warbugs, respectively.

It is fair to say that Tutsy and my skill level was a tad or two under Rocky and Arduenn's. But, it was nevertheless great fun and highly recommended!

Watch this short film to see us in action - 'The WarBug Jitterbug'!:

'The Gaggery' Presents...Doris the Nutri-Nutt™ Intern

The following is from a photoseries exhibition currently being held at 'The Gaggery' in Second Life^®.

The Gaggery is a gallery space for fetish art featuring images, mixed media, machinima, performance and installations. It is part of a sim-wide adult RP community 'The Blacklist' on the Cataclysm region.

The Blacklist is a kinky hilltop town and cummunity featuring the Blacklist Bar and Club, Fetishista House and, of course, The Gaggery itself.

All welcome! Contact Luci Von Smörgås for details.

Doris the Nutri-Nutt™ Intern

Prof. Quimby Shackleton PhD

Nutri-Nutt™ was invented in 1973 by Professor Q. Shackleton PhD - the distinguished geographer, Rotarian, golfer, mountain climber and sperm donor.

He founded the Nutri-Nutt™ Corporation in 2010.

Nutri-Nutt™ is a multi-purpose product made by old men, according to an ancient recipe. It's a versatile face cream and makes for a tasty light snack.

Nutri-Nutt® Donors

Hundreds of old men are milked at Nutri-Nutt™ every day, to provide us with the raw ingredient for our range of products. 

The sperm of men over 50 has been scientifically proven* to have a number of health benefits including weight loss, breast enlargement and improved complexion - it can even boost IQ! 

We harvest seed in commercial quantities at the Nutri-Nutt™ factory - by machine, and also by hand...

* Source: The Wrinkly Plums Research Group

Doris the Intern

Nutri-Nutt™ runs a popular intern programme - and here is one of our newest interns, Doris Tenenbaum - on her first day!

Doris is keen to learn the business and is hoping that by getting a regular supply of Nutri-Nutt™ (all our employees and interns are provided with free samples!) that her acne will clear up.

Hello Doris! Welcome to the company! We’ll start you on the fast-track programme immediately...

There is work to be done, Doris!

No time for note-taking now, Doris- here come your first two 'donors' - there'll be time for asking more questions at your tea break in a few hours...

Manual Sperm Collection

Looks like these two are very keen - they appear to want to get started right here on the warehouse floor! 

That’s it, Doris, open wide and tell them how much you love it - these two hairy brutes will break you in...

The Fast-Track to Corporate Success!

Some of our donors prefer the manual method to help them dump nut - it may take longer, but results show that we attain a much larger yield.  These two old duffers are regulars and they like to spend a bit of time taking turns to pump a fresh, new intern, before they donate. 

That's it Doris, you're doing great!  Why don't you try sucking on that big chopper while you get fucked?  Then we'll show you how to milk them.

Advance Sperm Collecting

Use your mouth and hands to milk them, Doris - here they go!  Remember to catch as much as you can in your mouth and in your hands, and try saying something dirty to them as they ejaculate - that often makes them bring up more.

Make sure you properly clean out their tubes and drain their sacks - don’t leave any behind - a nice, big guzzling suck will get out that last bit.

Now it’s over to the collecting buckets...

Every sperm is sacred

Here's the collecting bucket the men ejaculate into before it gets poured into the processing vats.

You can spew the load you've harvested into here, Doris.  Don't spill any and watch out, it's coming out your nose!  Good job. 

At this rate you'll be on track for Employee of the Month!

It'll be time for your tea break soon, but first we'll show you the packing department, where we fill, label and box up the jars of Nutri-Nutt™ before shipment.

Nutri-Nutt - Shipped worldwide

After mixing and processing, the Nutri-Nutt™ gets jarred and then boxed up.

Doris appears to be a natural with heavy loads!

Our product is then shipped to stores worldwide - and even delivered direct, to some of our greedier mail order customers.

Nutri-Nutt™ - you can spread it on your face, use it as a body cream and even eat it!  That’s why millions of consumers around the world ‘start the day with a load’.

* Warning: Contains semen.  May become highly addictive.  Actual sperm count may vary between jars.  Terms and conditions apply.

___________________________________________________________________

CREDITS:

Concept: Doris Tenenbaum, Nasty Puddlegum

Design & Layout: Nasty Puddlegum

Support, Development & Props: Doris Tenenbaum, Maybe Lisa, Emily Okelly, Pixie Rain, Professor Q. Shackleton PhD, Lar Jun

Exhibition Support: Luci von Smörgås and everyone at The Gaggery and the Cataclysm region

There's Not Enough Boobs in the World for Peris Ashton!

DJ Peris Ashton - "I'm a Boob Man, myself"

Yesterday, ever-popular rock and blues DJ Peris Ashton decided to throw a spontaneous “Best Boobs” contest at Old Lar’s House.

Much to Solok’s Puddlegum's disgust - but everybody else's relief - Peris made it a “Ladies Only” competition.

The Gentleman of Old Lar’s (and I use the word “gentleman” both loosely and under advisement of a lawyer) chipped together to form a linden prize pool of 2000 Space Bux!

(click to images to enlarge)

It was seriously good fun with lots of jolly laughter, light-hearted banter and bouncing boobies!

Sadly however, in a competition of this sort there can only be two winners....and those winners belonged to the lovely Xio Nyoki!

Enjoy these pictures of Xio and her prize winning assets - Peris did!

DJ Peris entertains Old Lar's patrons weekdays and Saturday at 5am SLT onwards. Come see & listen!

Pixie xx

Comedy and Machinima

“It’s not true unless it makes you laugh,

but you don’t understand it until it makes you weep.”

- The Illuminati Papers (1980)

Comedy is difficult to do.

More precisely, *good* comedy is difficult to do. Shit comedy is perfectly easy to do!

Leaving aside the fact that most comedic events seem to centre around clown-like slapstick laughter at other peoples’ expense, creating good quality (and by that I mean *real* “laughing out loud” belly laughter) is actually very hard to do.

How much more so then in Second Life where avatar facial expressions are, at very best, basic and unconvincing, and most of the resident population do not use voice chat.

In a single stroke, two of the primarily mainstays of comedy – face making and voice intonation (which includes imitationary and onomatopoeic sounds) – are severely hampered when using SL.

Now, that’s not to say that there is not humour and laughter in SL – far, far from it.

I spend a goodly chunk of my time in SL sharing laughter with others. I know numerous people who are adept at using Second Life for “comedy” – a skilful combination of role playing, method acting, quick wit and fast typing; the Puddlegum Family being exemplary examples.

There are also Second Life “comedy clubs” which are almost always conducted in voice and try, as much as possible, to emulate the RL versions of such venues. They are popular and manage to create a fun atmosphere. The comedian could be a professional, semi-pro and there are even amateur “pass the mic” nights. It’s all good.  

But these are not quite what I want to address in this blog-post.

Today I am considering Second Life being used as a platform for the production of a comedy machinima, or perhaps even a sit-com.

And here it gets sticky. If comedy is difficult to do even under the best of conditions then how much more so in…well, let’s just say, “in Second Life”.

It ain’t gonna be easy!

But it can be done! And it *has* been done.

Although I have seen quite a few SL machinima which have made me smile or amused me, a number that have made me giggle or chuckle, I can only think of four off the top of my head which have given me a hearty-healthy belly laugh (happy to be advised of others!):

·        ‘Man Vs Second Life’ by Sean Krueger

·        ‘Man Vs Second Life Part 2’ by Sean Krueger

·        ‘My Online Girlfriend’ by Scooby Mode

The fourth film – 2^nd Place Winner of MachinimUWA IV - is the subject of the remainder of this blog-post.

‘Artwashers’ (embedded blow) by Friday Siamendes is a very funny feel-good film. I am sure you’ll enjoy it.

But, I would be dishonest if I neglected to point out certain things about these four films.

The fact is none of them are particularly special or impressive cinemagraphically. There. I said it.

Sorry.

But the fact is most RL comedy films are not especially impressive cinemagraphically either – and they don’t need to be! What they need, above all else, is a bloody funny script! And these four films provide that aplenty.

I am trying to think of a film specifically billed as a “comedy” that *is* cinemagraphically impressive...’Time Bandits’ maybe? The Bill and Ted franchise perhaps? Woody Allen films are always funny and impressive but not quite what we are talking about here.

I am sure that there must be cinemagraphically impressive comedies. Tutsy is almost certainly going to supply me with a long list of impressive French-speaking comedies to watch to prove the point (but I haven’t even finished watching ‘Blue Angel’ with Marlene Dietrich yet!)

But what I am trying to say is that a good comedy script can easily make up for any perceived weakness in the technical quality of the filmmaking – in bucket loads, in fact!

‘Artwashers’ was awarded 2^nd Place at MachinimUWA IV and I think this surprised quite a number of people, including me. In my MachinimUWA IV Top 10, I had it ranked at #7 (which is still bloody high, in a field of 80 entries!).

But it is a good film. A fun film. With a great script.

And these elements were strong enough to carry it to such a high ranking at a prestigious machinima award ceremony.

I hope to see more SL machinima comedies being created in the future – there is clearly a desire and a market for them – just look at the impressive view figures for the four films I have listed.

Please now enjoy Friday Siamendes’ ‘Artwashers’:

Meet the Puddlegums!

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