Wednesday, 21 August 2013

Je m'appelle Pixié De La Rain!

In the last few days I have been asked numerous times why I have changed my name by deed poll to Pixié De La Rain.
It is a good question. The answer is very simple.
It is because I am now French.
I understand how that may come as a shock to some. And believe me, I did not take this decision lightly. I hope to explain my reasons here.
Contrary to the rumours being spread around Old Lar’s House, I am not suffering from the psychological disorder known as ‘Paris Syndrome’, or as I now prefer to call it, ‘Syndrome de Paris’.
Syndrome de Paris, as Herr Doktor Alfred Ninetails Psy.D explained to me whilst taking time out from his important research into Compulsive Happiness Disorder at the esteemed Viennese Institute of Mental Cases, was first noted in the French journal of psychiatry in 2004. Symptoms include acute delusional states, hallucinations, derealisation, depersonalization, anxiety, dizziness, tachycardia, diarrhoea, herpes, genital warts, intense pain, profuse sweating, difficulty in breathing, loss of consciousness, violent convulsions and, finally, death.
Japanese tourists are especially susceptible to this disorder.
Doktor Ninetails, who I first met when he was treating Naughty Nataly for nymphomania as one of the conditions of her parole, went on the say that Japanese magazines are primarily responsible for Syndrome de Paris by presenting an extraordinarily idealised image of Paris to the Japanese people. The populace are bombarded with the idea that most citizens on the streets of Paris look like fashion models and dress in high-fashion brands. When they eventually come to visit the city, the disparity between their false expectations and the actual reality - combined with other factors such as jet-lag, language differences, the price of a cup of coffee and a glass of beer - lead to such a culture shock that Syndrome de Paris rapidly sets in. Approximately twenty Japanese tourists a year still die from this serious disorder despite President Nicky Sardonic assuring Emperor Hirohito that procedures had been put in place to ensure that this would never happen again.
No. None of this has anything to do with why I am now French.
The simple fact is that I have noticed that I am spending more and more of my time in SL with people from France.
They have freely offered me love and laughter, culture and beauty, imagination and creativity, friendship and support in my SL endeavours. And to those people - tủtsy, Nitrō Firégῧậrd, Klῧte Cŏppōlᾶ, Iȏnǒ Ǟllēn, Kᾶké Brœk, the beautiful Nǐmȅ, .::DǒL::. – and others whom I hope will forgive me for not naming specifically, I announce my nationalisation as a French person.
We also fondly remember the delightful and talented Bisou who was sadly and suddenly taken from us only this week after being assassinated by a soldato of the Greek Mafia, the Costa Hubris.
And to all my French friends I also say, please feel free to learn English in your own time and at your own pace.
With love and gratitude,
Pixié De La Rain xx

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